New Orleans is a city with its own language. Street names ignore every rule of French, English, and common sense. The food has words you've never seen before. And locals have a way of saying things that'll leave you nodding politely while understanding nothing. Consider this your cheat sheet.

NEW ORLEANS - First things first. It's pronounced <NEW OR-linz>, or if you're feeling relaxed, <NEW AW-linz>. Some locals even land on something like <NAW-linz>. What you must never, ever say is <new or-LEENZ>.

BEIGNET - Pronounced <ben-YAY>. A pillowy, deep-fried square of dough buried under an avalanche of powdered sugar. Café Du Monde in the French Quarter is the most famous spot for them. There is no graceful way to eat one.

BOURBON STREET - Locals say <BUR-bin>, not <BUR-bon> like the whiskey. It's the most famous (and loudest) street in the Quarter. Worth a walk-through for the experience, but know that most locals spend their time elsewhere.

CARONDELET STREET - Pronounced <ka-'ron-da-LET>, not <ka-'ron-da-LAY>.

CRAWFISH - Not "crayfish." Not "crawdads." In New Orleans, they're crawfish. To eat one, twist the tail from the head, pinch the tail to push the meat out, and if you're feeling brave, suck the head. That's where the flavor is.

DRESSED - When ordering a po-boy, "dressed" indicates lettuce, tomatoes, pickles and mayonnaise, on it.

ESPLANADE - Walkway. The street name is pronounced <es'-pla-NADE>, and the last syllable rhymes with "raid", not "rod".

ÉTOUFFÉE - Pronounced <AY-too-fay>. A rich, roux-based stew of crawfish or shrimp smothered in seasoned sauce and served over rice. The word means "smothered" in French, which tells you everything you need to know. If you see it on a menu, order it.

FAUBOURG - Pronounced <FO-borg>. It means "neighborhood," as in Faubourg Marigny or Faubourg Tremé. You'll see it on maps and street signs, and now you'll know what it means.

GRIS-GRIS - Pronounced <GREE-GREE>. Noun, A (voodoo) spell. Can be applied for nefarious purposes ("to put a gris-gris on someone"), or as a force to ward off evil, like wearing a gris-gris bag (the folks at the Voodoo Shop on Dumaine will make one to order for about $20).

LAGNIAPPE - Pronounced <LAN-yap>. A little something extra. Lagniappe is when your butcher gives you a pound and two ounces of hot sausage but only charges you for a pound, or when the waiter at your favorite restaurant brings you an extra dessert or something, and doesn't charge you.

MARDI GRAS - This grand pre-Lenten celebration for which New Orleans is famous is pronounced <MAR-dee GRAW>.

MARIGNY - Pronounced <MAR-ih-nee>, emphasis on the first syllable. The Faubourg Marigny is the colorful, artsy neighborhood just downriver from the French Quarter, full of live music venues, quirky bars, and Victorian shotgun houses. Even with lots of practice, Brittany still can't nail this one...just ask her yourself.

METAIRIE - Pronounced <MET-uh-ree>. This is the large suburb just west of New Orleans, in Jefferson Parish. You've probably already driven through it from the airport without realizing it.

MILAN STREET - Pronounced <MY-lan>. Nothing quippy here to say.

NEUTRAL GROUND - The grassy or cement strip in the middle of the road. The terms "median" and/or "island" are never used in New Orleans.

PO-BOY - The quintessential New Orleans sandwich, served on crispy French bread that shatters when you bite into it. Fillings range from fried shrimp and oysters to roast beef swimming in gravy. Order it "dressed" (see above) unless you want it plain. The name supposedly comes from the "poor boys" — striking streetcar workers who were fed free sandwiches during a 1929 labor dispute.

QUARTER - As in the French Quarter — the iconic, centuries-old neighborhood along the Mississippi River known for its wrought-iron balconies, jazz clubs, and yes, Bourbon Street. If someone says "I'm heading to the Quarter," they mean the French Quarter. No further clarification needed.

SHOTGUN HOUSE - A long, narrow house where all the rooms are lined up one behind the other with no hallway. The name comes from the idea that you could fire a shotgun through the front door and the bullet would travel clean out the back without hitting a wall. You'll see hundreds of them. They're impossible to miss.

TCHOUPITOULAS STREET - Pronounced <'chop-a-TOO-las>. It's easier to pronounce than to spell. Spelling "Tchoupitoulas" is the true test of a native; if New Orleans was a country at war, you'd ask a guy to spell this to make sure he was on your side, just like in all the old WWII movies.